You show up at the reading of the will distributing the assets of your late second cousin twice removed.  Expecting little more than a few spoons from the family silver service, you practically faint when the lawyer says you’ve inherited a cruise line!  

This is both good news and bad news.  The good news is that you’ve taken cruises for years and have espoused may opinions on what you like and don’t like, frequently muttering “If I owned this cruise line……….” daily aboard ship.  The bad news is that you also have to stay in business when the price of fuel  increases daily during a bad economy.  

If this curse/blessing happened to me, the changes I’d make to Campbell Cruises include:   

1.  I’d force Steiner’s of London to change its spa policies.  This company operates the spas aboard every cruise ship in the industry, except Cunard Line and Regent Seven Seas Cruises’ vessels.  Since staff makes most of its salary on commissions from the sale of products, it’s typical to get a hard sell in the middle of a very pricey massage.  I’d force Steiners to pay masseuses more to and give passengers a quality treatment.

2.  Install hooks on the walls of all cabins so passengers may hang hats, bags or whatever they like there.  (Ok, a personal thing).

3.  Schedule daytime stops in Puerto Rico so passengers can stroll around Old San Juan and visit local historic attractions….instead of pulling into port at 4:00 p.m. when everything is closing so passengers are forced to buy a pricey excursion to see a local nightime floorshow.

4.  Increasing the quality of food so it’s at least on par with Carnival Cruise Line’s fare.  That inclues serving great coffee and adding a 24/7 pizzeria.  And, paying a fortune to hire the person in charge of Carnival’s outstanding onboard entertainment.

5.  Offer obscene amounts of money to lure away the person in charge of Princess Cruises’ shore excursions since this cruise line does it best.

6. Ditto the head of Royal Caribbean’s onboard children’s programs.

7. Like Holland America and Princess Cruises, employ only physicians certified by U.S. and/or British hospitals in emergency room procedures.

8. Marry a Saudi prince in the hopes of keeping fuel costs in check.

9.  Sell the cruise line to Carnival Corporation, since everything CEO Micky Arison acquires turns to gold …. or at least survives a rough economic patch.

10.  Make my dog Micky (yea, named after the above) the cruise line’s mascot so he can sail whenever I do which may include turning a cabin into a kennel/puppy play area. 

Should the curse/blessing of inheriting a cruise line fall on you, what changes would you make?

Similar Posts

Will the Airline Chaos Affect Your Cruise?