One thing the newest cruise ships all have in common is an enormous investment in kids programs and activities designed to capture the attention of vacationing families.   Ranging from faux surfing “Flow Riders” to water slides and pricey affiliations with famous TV characters — Royal Caribbean collaborates with Dream Works, Norwegian with Nickelodeon – those of us who critique these new behemoths have a lot to write about.

One thing it’s easy to overlook is whether cruising children actually like all this stuff.

So to keep it real, I interviewed an experienced kid cruiser, Jay, for his input after actually trying out some of the newest bells and whistles that adult writers like me find so impressive.

When I asked how many cruises he’s been on, 12-year-old Jay countered “before or after I was born?”   As I said, he’s an experienced cruiser.    The answer is seven, including Pride of America (Hawaii), Norwegian Pearl (Alaska) and in the Caribbean, Celebrity Solstice, Liberty of the Seas, Norwegian Sky ,Caribbean Princess and the latest activity-filled behemoth Norwegian Epic.

Norwegian Epic

While my review of Norwegian Cruise Line’s Norwegian Epic was fairly positive, especially about the innovative kids activities, Jay felt differently.   I was an observer and reporter while he participated.

Regarding one of Norwegian Epic’s most notable features, the deck top water slides, Jay said,  “I got stuck in the water slide and it was scary.  That’s never happened to me before at any water park.   And, the deck was so hot and that I burned my feet.  They (NCL staff) knew there was a problem but didn’t fix it,” he said.    He advises kids to avoid wearing prescription glasses on the slides because the glass can break; plastic sunglasses, however, are fine.

Jay made a criticism I heard during my cruise:  the top deck is too small for all the passengers and during days at sea, the pools were over-crowded.   Noting that Epic has a form of “ice skating”, he said that you’re skating on plastic and it feels that way.

“I think they tried to put too much stuff on the ship,” he said.

He liked Blue Man Group and gave thumbs up to Norwegian Epic’s food – “the ice cream was the best!” — with the exception of the Nickelodeon character’s breakfast and the fare served in the Cirque supper club.   However, “The Ice Bar which was smaller than my cabin.  I think it’s ridiculous to charge $5.00 just to see the place.”

Like a number of passengers, Jay was unenthusiastic about the ship’s cabins.  “There’s no privacy.  While I was watching TV, someone used the bathroom and I could hear him.  It was very disturbing.  While you’re in the shower, no one can leave and no one can come in.   My bed was a sofa, small and not very comfortable.  But you got to sleep somewhere,” he said.

Exciting Destinations Score A+

Jay’s favorite cruises have been in Hawaii and Alaska because of the quality and quantity of memorable active excursions.

During the Pride of Aloha Hawaii cruise, Jay says “I went zip lining, rock climbing, paddle bicycle, surfing for the first time.  I saw lava falling into the water and where Jurassic park was filmed.   It was the best!”

Equally thrilling was his Norwegian Pearl cruise in Alaska where he went salmon fishing, river rafting on rapids and gold panning.

Rating the Cruise Lines

Jay can’t wait for his next cruise aboard Oasis of the Seas in part because he’s a big Royal Caribbean fan.   “Royal Caribbean never repeats itself … even in the buffet the food may be the same, but the carved fruit will be different.  There are always surprises,” he says.

Advice for Kids

I asked Jay for tips to pass along to other children taking a cruise.  “Look for a cruise line with good kids center, because you’ll make new friends.  When you cruise on Royal Caribbean, sign up for Flow Rider lessons first thing.  Take cameras with a lot of memory and your wallet too, because there is a lot of stuff to do but you need money (such lessons on the flo rider).”  And, he recommends shows in the theaters (comedy, Beatles impersonators, magic show) because the entertainment is wonderful.

Like most experienced cruisers Jay is looking at other destinations he can visit by cruise ship.  At the top of his list:  South America, especially Peru.